pictures of life in saudi

Sa77e7 100% kul shai Mahram . بدهم يحرموا عيشتنا

مقال جميل في التربية

السؤال هنا كم واحد بعد قراءته لهذا المقال سيتغير ؟؟؟

نريد فقط ثلاث مقالات من هالنوع ... وشعب كامل يتفاعل ....!!!!

مقال : عبدالرحمن الشهيب ..

يسحب الزوج نفساً عميقاً من لي المعسل ثم يدخل يده في جيبه ساحباً الجوال ليهاتف أم العيال: وصلتوا...!

أنا سأتأخر قليلاً في استراحة التسدح!... ثم يأتي لمنزله قبالة الفجر..الأولاد من أن يدخلوا المنزل يرمون كل شيء في أيديهم .... حقائبهم المدرسية، أحذيتهم، بقايا فسحتهم...

ثم يصيح الصبي ذو العاشرة في وجه الخادمة الآسيوية: 'جيبي لي مويه'، فتركض فزعة لتحضر كوب الماء لهذا الصبي المأفون، وهو لا يريد ماء، قدر ما كان يريد أن يلقي أوامر!

أطفالنا ما أطول ألسنتهم أمام أمهاتهم والخادمات ولكنهم أمام الكاميرا يصبحون كالأرانب المذعورة، لا أدري كيف يحدث هذا

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أحسن شيء سائق وشغالة، من يتحمل مشاوير أم العيال، ومن يتحمل قيادة السيارات في شوارعنا المكتظة بالمخالفات المرورية والطائشين والسائقين النزقين، فليتحمل المسئولية السائق الآسيوي فكلها حفنة ريالات.

ومن يتحمل تغسيل الصحون والملابس وشطف البلاط وتسقية الحديقة وكي الملابس.... آه ما أثقل دم كي الملابس ... هاهي حفنة ريالات أخرى لخادمة آسيوية تعمل كل هذه الأعمال الشاقة...

ولتتفرغ أم العيال لتصليح الحلى والبنات لمتابعة الفضائيات والتجول في الأسواق

والأولاد لمضايقة بنات الناس في الأسواق!

وهو لا يدري أنها ممكن أن تكون أخته في يوم من الأيام،

الكسل أحلى من العسل.. ماذا جنى الأولاد والبنات من هذا الكسل؟ لا شيء سوى الطفش!

دائماً صغارنا وكبارنا طفشانين.. لأنهم لا يعملون شيئاً.. من لا يتعب لا يحس بطعم الراحة ومن لا يجوع لا يحس بطعم الأكل، كل مشاوير بيتزاهت وماكدونالد لم تعد تسعد صغارنا ولم يبق إلا متعة صغيرة في النوم في بيت الخالة والتي لا يسمح بها دائماً ولذلك بقي لها شيء من المتعة !

هذا السيناريو السائد في معظم المنازل السعودية والخليجية، المصيبة لا تحدث الآن ولكنها تحدث بعد عشرين سنة من التبطح تكون نتيجتها بنت غير صالحة للزواج وولد غير صالح لتحمل أعباء الزواج ، لأنه ببساطة غياب تحمل المسؤولية لمدة عشرين عاماً لا يمكن أن يتغير من خلالها الابن بسبب قرار الزواج أو بسبب تغير سياسة المنزل، لأن هذه خصال وقدرات إذا لم تبن مع الزمن فإنه من الصعوبة بمكان استعادتها.

الانضباط ممارسة يومية لا يمكن أن تقرر أن تنضبط في عمر متأخرة لكي يحدث الانضباط.

وبلا انضباط لا يمكن أن تستقيم حياة

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بيل غيتس أغنى رجل في العالم يملك 49 ألف مليون دولار أي ما يعادل 180 ألف مليون ريال سعودي ويعمل في منزله شخصان فقط !

تخيلوا لو كان بيل غيتس خليجياً كم سيعمل في منزله من شغاله؟ 30، 40، ألف، أو أهل اندونيسيا كلهم !

أذكر أيام دراستي في أمريكا أنني سكنت مع عائلة أمريكية ثرية ولم يكونوا يأكلون في ماكدونالد إلا مرة في الشهر وتحت إلحاح شديد من أولادهم، ولم يكن أولادهم يحصلون على مصروف إلا عن طريق العمل في شركة والدهم عن أجر بالساعة.

لا أحد 'يبعزق' الدراهم على أولاده كأهل الخليج.

جيل الآباء الحاليين في الخليج عانى من شظف العيش وقسوة التربية فجاء الإغداق المالي والدلال على الجيل الحالي بلا حدود كتعويض عن حرمان سابق.

حتى أثرياء عرب الشام ومصر أكثر حذراً في مسألة الصرف على أولادهم ..

الآن أجيال كثيرة في الخليج قادمة للزواج لن تستطيع تحمل الأعباء المالي ة لخادمة، حتى وإن كانت خادمة بيت الأهل تقوم بهذا الدور مؤقتاً فإنها لن تستطيع على المدى الطويل ..

والابن الفاضل سيتأفف من أول مشوار لزوجته الجديدة ثم تبدأ الشجارات الصغيرة والكبيرة التي تتطور وتصل للمحاكم وتنتهي بالطلاق وهذا مايفسر ارتفاع معدلات الطلاق في المملكة والخليج في السنوات الأخيرة .

نحن في الخليج كمن يلعب مباراة كرة قدم ومهزوم فيها تسعة صفر وفي الدقيقة 49 من الشوط الثاني للمباراة لا يريد أن يتعادل فقط بل يريد أن يفوز!

وهذا في حكم المستحيل، هذا ما يحدث بالضبط في الخليج على المستوى الأسري وأحياناً على المستوى الدولي ..

الحياة كمباراة كرة القدم إذا أردت أن تكسبها، فلابد أن تعد نفسك لها إعداداً جيداً بالتدريب والممارسة الجيدة والأهم من ذلك أن تلعب بجد من الدقيقة الأولى من المباراة وليس في الدقيقة 49

في الخليج يعيشون الحياة على طريقة 'تتدبر'!

يذهبون إلى السينما متأخرين ثم يجدون التذاكر نفدت ثم يجادلون بائع التذاكر 'دبر لنا ياخي'!!

هذه التذاكر ينطبق عليها ما ينطبق على تربية الأولاد وتحمل المسؤولية والمستقبل وتبعاته، في المجتمع المدني يجب أن تدبر أمورك مبكراً وفي أمور الحياة يجب أن تبذل عمرك كله، الطفل الذي يرمي حقيبته بجانب أقرب جدار في المنزل سيدفع ثمن هذه اللامبالاة حينما يكبر ومن أصعب الأشياء تغيير الطبائع والسلوك ..

تتدبر' هذه تصلح قديماً في زمن الغوص وزمن الصحراء والحياة في انتظار المطر، ولكنها لا تصلح للحياة المدنية التي تحتاج إلى انضباط ومنهج وتخطيط وتدبير منا نحن في كل شؤون حياتنا منذ الدقيقة الأولى من المباراة !

الآن من نلوم على هذه اللامبالاة، هل نلوم النفط؟أم الآباء أم الأمهات، أم الأولاد أم البنات ؟ أم تتـدبــر !!

Saudi men are metrosexuals

It is amazing how you feel something, like something not right in the air and then years after someone, some gay British guy called Mark Simpson coins it for you. "Metrosexual". You finally go " ahhhhh, so that's what it was".

I always didn't go for guys who fussed over their looks. It creeped me out. I mean hello.. I am the girl here, so when I did not date saudi guys who fuss over their white thobs and their shimaghs which they give names to like the cobra thinggie or the i don't know what kind of fold hehe it kinda turns me off. Put aside the perfumes, the designer clothes, the way they spend time doing their goatees etc etc etc.. GAY.

But you know what... these guys, they are just like morphing I guess, evolving in this world, i mean .. caveman syndrome doesn't really get much done in this non dinosaur age.. so what can a girl like me doo??? I gotta adapt too u know

So, I am now faced with a challenge. A guy, model type, does facials, with an earing, tight black french top, ladies boys .. thinks his ass is cute , you know blah blah.. and he wants to go out with me. OH MY GOD. why me and how can I fake it? hahah

wait a minute.. just because this guy ok let me bring up the definition of metrosexul from askmen.com :

what is a metrosexual?

The newly popular media and marketing buzzword seems to mean different things to different people, but in general, a metrosexual :

is a modern, usually single man in touch with himself and his feminine side;

grooms and buffs his head and body, which he drapes in fashionable clothing both at work or before hitting an evening hotspot;

has discretionary income to stay up to date with the latest hairstyles, the newest threads, and the right shaped shoes;

confuses some guys when it comes to his sexuality;

makes these same guys jealous of his success with the ladies -- for many metros, to interact with women is to flirt;

impresses the women who enjoy his company with the details that make the man;

Among them:

• his appreciation for literature, cinema, or other arts


• his flair for cooking


• his savoir faire in choosing the perfect wine and music


• his eye for interior design

is a city boy or, if living a commute away from downtown, is still urbane, if not rightly urban;

enjoys reading men's magazines...

My God.. what is a woman for now? lol I am so glad I wasn't born a generation later , I am getting F____ now what more the generation after me. Hey! I am old fashioned! come on, anyone who grew up with cinderall and snow white is, I suppose as opposed to rebellious Mulan or like maannn did anyone watch Pocahontas 2??? where she ran off with that other English guy not Capt John Smith ( who turned out to be metrosexual .. and British lol go figure) ... I mean, woman! you want a man, not someone to compete with you, we can take gays ok.. at least they will never be women but like men.. men who are supposed to complete us! lol talk about insult man.. where are the days we just worried about weight loss now we have to worry about curling our eyelashes huhuhuh what a heart attack time bomb to live knowing your man is prettier than you, more maintained than you, oh those highlights are great i need to go to my bf's salon .. sheeshhh NO NOT ME! I want to be the woman in my relationship...

and to think Arab especially Saudi society is very gender role specific with the nuclear family of stay at home mom and smelly out there working dad...

like a lot of things in Saudi.. everything is just inside out.. lol Doesn't make sense.

Good luck to me on my metrosexual experience I hope I last till after dinner.. I am shaking from the prospects of conversation lol

Badawiya: Blogging catharsis

To that woman.

They say that when you stop blogging you are probably in a better emotional state. The need to blog is gone. The time to do it is gone, the need for people to hear about it.. is gone. Simply because, you are happier. * whether you want to believe it or not*

I know some of you are raising your eyebrows thinking " that's not right! some of us blog for fun you know!!!" I say, "honey, the point is you are not socially adept enough (friends, family, colleagues, community, people who genuinely have the brains and humanosocio conscience to listen and care) to actually share these happy times, insights or fun with.. (ok before I get into a literal debate) I am talking about personal ( as in, in person)l encounters.

Some how, the potential of people reading soothes us. I am guilty too.. but then again unlike the rest of the world my social life is restricted in spite of me, and blogging truly is the only way to communicate around here. "That woman" knows more than I do that when we were in Saudi leading controlled, routinized, socially and morally restricted lives we were blogging like the blogosphere was our universe, and it was. I even walled paper my blog with space and stars.

the intensity of our blogging, the focus, the heart and passion, all these were a result of not having outlets to diffuse and disperse our thoughts and reflections. And boy! do we have lots of those over there!

I noticed this theory of blogging catharsis to be true when I had this "blind love" phase. Because I couldn't share my love, joy, problems, hopes and fears with friends and family ( for reasons pertaining as to why it was blind love) I could not stop blogging. Wiriting and writing, screaming to the universe, bearing my soul, webpages and webpages, every word weighed a thousand sighs and every line i swear when i go back and read them.. shock me at how poetic, painful and beautiful the writer expresses the symphonies of her life.

I can hardly recognize that it was me.

Think about it. Who blogs about happy stuff? we all blog about problems, issues, criticism, blah blah .. we don't seem to need to share how happy we are with the ( unknown) universe as much as we hurry to spend a night with a frap writing eulogies about an unrequested love or the lonely night of an aimless journey.

* I bet if you made a survey about how many blogs are happier, good luck! Why then would people pay people to write about the nice things?! ehh think about it!

A wise man once said that there were only 7 stories in this world from which every other story is a mere derivative of.

Try it. Think of any story in your life, in the movies, in the books you've read. Anything that is out of these seven basics?

* Note: Being a spiritual mystic ( nothing to do with being 07 believe me) I am not surprised, since there are 7 days of creation, 7 skies, 7 seas, 7 days of the week, seven ayahs for soorat alfatiha.

Anyway here are the 7 stories that rule the world:

1. 'Tragedy'. Hero with a fatal flaw meets tragic end. Macbeth or
Madame Bovary.
2. 'Comedy'. Not necessary laugh-out-loud, but always with a happy ending, typically of romantic fulfilment, as in Jane Austen.
3. 'Overcoming the Monster'. As in Frankenstein or 'Jaws'. Its psychological appeal is obvious and eternal.--- thinking here exorcist?
4. 'Voyage and Return'. Booker argues that stories as diverse as Alice
in Wonderland and H G Wells' The Time Machine and Coleridge's The Rime of the Ancient Mariner follow the same archetypal structure of personal development through leaving, then returning home.
5. 'Quest'. Whether the quest is for a holy grail, a whale, or a kidnapped child it is the plot that links a lot of the most popular fiction. The quest plot links Lords of the Rings with Moby Dick and a thousand others in between.
6. 'Rags to Riches'. The riches in question can be literal or metaphoric. See Cinderella, David Copperfield, Pygmalion. --- pretty woman? ;)
7. 'Rebirth'. The 'rebirth' plot - where a central character suddenly finds a new reason for living - can be seen in A Christmas Carol, It's a Wonderful Life, Crime and Punishment and Peer Gynt., Badawiya's life? hehe

Oh well... from trying to show "That woman" that she she is fine, to the revelation of "blogging catharsis to the seven stories of the world.. I leave you with this quote:

"The highest reward for a person's toil is not what they get for it, but what they become by it."

To "That Woman", to me, to you and all of us Saudis, we are the chosen ones. Chosen to be of THE generation that will bear witness to the greatest story in the history of Arabia, if not the story writers. Not everyone can see changes happen before their eyes... not everyone can actually write a chapter of it like we can, what was it like 10 years ago? what is it like now? can you believe it? stop and think... some people just eat, shit, lead boring lives, die.. no purpose, no faith, no joy no dreams no nothing.

We are destined to live a number of lives, each story with a lifetime in it.. and I wouldn't have it otherwise.

That Woman --- The come back.

How can I start writing easily after the longest time. It was not what I call a writer's block or the lack of ideas to write about, perhaps it was more of an interest-less period in writing my reflections.

As I am writing this post I am wondering, what should this post be about, my life? my love? me? her? them?

Perhaps it should be about me...

There is no life less tragic, funny nor dramatic than that of a Saudi woman...it is full of intense emotions, drama and irony. As I lay down on my bed today realizing that; well it is Sunday and I have absolutely nothing to do, my daughter has her own plans today and well I have really nothing. no one to really talk or cling to. I have abandoned by all means my friends and the people I cared for to be where I am today. a future career that seems promising, a great education and my very own house that no one controls but me.

could it be that at the end of the road I'll regret leaving the oppressed sand box? regret abandoning so many good things to acquire a freedom that i've always dreamed about? I don't know.

sometimes it is best to say nothing at all!

Badawiyas: Victims of our own silence

A reflection in the mirror
Dreams denied
A road untaken
a soul on trial

The sun is rising .. gone is the night
lost is all hope , herself she must find

Living to exist and not exisiting to live
an open door of what a woman could give

lost in the plot of a story untold
she bangs her head, tries be bold

To be of the masses and not the rule
is only a life but chosen by fools
She is the rule and she'll make them see
who she really is , she will be free

To fail again and prove them right
the thought just crushes her
in time she'll fight

And just incase they might be right
her silence will be heard
by the reflection in the mirror
in the silence of the night

Badawiya's Guide to Life

• You can never learn from your mistakes. The magnitude of the mistake lies in the reason behind it. And that is so very subjective.

• You can never play according to the rules. The rules depend on the game. Master a few games and you can get away with almost anything. Including murder.

• Don’t look inside yourself for the answers.. that’s bullshit. The answer is outside of you, if you knew the answers you wouldn’t be looking for them in the first place! It’s not about you. It’s about the others. The world around you. In sociology I learned that a person is a sum of all his experiences and acquaintances. His spirituality, norms and obligations are dictated by the people around him. Therefore, the inside is governed by the outside right? Look for the world you want to be part of, go to it and there you will find the answers.
  Life is so full of different games and playgrounds. Stick to one game, one playground and then your justifications I will accept. Don’t justify polygamy to me using Islam, when you are not a Muslim.

• If what is clear and simple to you is vague and complicated to me. Don’t be disappointed. It has nothing to do with intellect. It may be the curse of being brilliant. Einstein had a hard time counting his change , so do I.

• Mature. This word shouldn’t be a word. A person has to mature in a lot of things and it doesn’t happen at the same time. Physically, intellectually and socially are to name a few.
  Well rounded- I thought of it as maturity but now I know that it is even more. To be have a well rounded personality is actually NOT POSSIBLE. Nobody is perfect. Intellectuals have minimum social skills, the religious have no clue about what’s really going on. Politicians are bound to get their hands dirty, mothers are biased when it comes to their kids, the under privileged have no etiquette, provincial people don’t have a sense of fashion….

• Tolerance- It all boils down to this. You want to be mature, you want to be well rounded ? Be Tolerant. Be Human. Be sensitive to others around you, their circumstances, their backgrounds. Judge the whole picture not the moment. Understand that there are reasons behind how people act and why they’ve become what they are. Realize that beneath it all we are fundamentally the same, ruled by the same basic needs and emotions. She is a mother too, he is a brother too, We all strive for a better quality of life … Be tolerant. Don’t spoil the few moments you’ve been blessed with when all of you different people come together for one purpose, be tactful even if the person offending you is not. Don’t stoop to a lower level just to communicate your thoughts. If that’s the only way to get your point across let it be, walk away, you don’t need people like that in your life anyway! In the end, after the joys and tears, after all the years they will let you down. The longer it takes… the more disappointing it is. So spare yourself.