Thursday, April 19, 2007

About roundabouts and comfort rooms

Lawrence of Arabia is responsible for the engineering and thee architectural designs of what we now call the city of Jeddah.

Since Lawrence was busy figuring out who he really was in the desert the construction of roundabouts got messed up in the sense that the Saudis didn’t know they shouldn’t put traffic lights in them. Today I suffer the consequences of Lawrence’s bipolarity because I have to listen to my father Cuss and curse about traffic lights in roundabouts every morning. And boy is Jeddah full of them.

There is dawwar Al-falak- its supposed to be a representation of an orbit with planets inside it but since its half an orbit it looks like a horse shoe and I personally call it “the fallopian tube”

Dawwar Al-Darraja- “ the bicycle” – it is so big that my dad says it used to be Noah’s ( coz people were big those days) and there is a spare tire just beside it.

Dawwar al -??- I don’t even know what its called in Arabic but I call it “dead chicken” roundabout. By now you get that dawwar means roundabout right? Anyway dead chicken coz its like a boat with like oval sails on the sides and two poles sticking out behind each sail and at the end of the poles there is a small crescent and it just looks to me like a dead chicken on its back with its legs up claws and all.

And there is dawwar al Moj- “the wave” , I say it looks like a snails head, my mom says it’s a an octopus with one of its tentacles reaching out but someone actually said they called it “the clit” coz from the backside “ the back of the octopus and the neck of the snail it does look like err..”

Then there is the camel, the fist, the rocket, the shell, the fish, the steel, the history, the stallion , the fountain, the globe, the clam, the lanterns, the cars smashed in a block, lol the water purification system tahlia ( mini representation lol ) etc.

Anywayyyyyyyyy… enough dawwars.

Did you know that in the bathrooms like the sign of male is a guy wearing a thob right? Which is like a dress and if u didn’t know Saudi and u were a woman you’d go into the males CR wont ya?
Same goes to the ladies room. The abaya on the head and the shapeless figure in the sign looks like a man wearing a “ghotra” headdress and a man can easily go into the ladies room especially if he was a badoo who can’t read? Right?

Sigh… I love Saudi

Saudi women are sheep not "cheap" and a little badoo-hadar history

last night i was tired. My dad picked me up from work I just wanted to get into our flat and lay flat on my flat bed on my "how- i wish-flat- tummy". As I was waiting for the lift to go tinnnnnnnnnnng an ugly stinking short thob wearing bush faced mutawwa3 was doing the " ehmmm ehmmm" like i was some kinda none arabic speaking donkey trained to know what 'ehhm ehmm' means.. this time it meant.. "move over, the more holy and worthy shall enter the lift" ( he means stinking socks, gloves head to toe covered woman in a black abaya that probably hasnt been washed for 3 months.

Anyway, go ahead please im about to throw up from the sight just save me the agony and disappear.

Women are sheep. Yeah I overheard a couple of guys talking about how this guy in flat number 20 didnt go to the mosque. therefore obviously he is a bad man and "their" women. They really say "our" women. Are not safe in their locked apartments while their husbands are at work because that guy who doesnt pray is retired and doesnt go to the mosque.

Whattt? I asked my dad" what about the women?" are they that stupid that they just go to the "bad mans" house and get fu***? and then they're the victims and its the fault of the husbands allowing themselves to leave them alone in a 13 story building with the flat on the 3rd floor has a guy they dont see at the mosque and is probably a pimp??????

Yeah thats how they think. women have no control over their thoughts and actions. everything is everyone elses fault because after all.. hey... we "lack brain and faith".

Imagine locking women up in homes because if u dont they will automatically go do someone. because it is nature because that is what a woman is.

the more at home , ignorant, obedient she is the more she is worth. The more open minded, strong willed and educated the more exposed and damaged goods she is.

We are sheep. baaaaaaaaaa. Hey at least we are not "cheap". Now doesnt that make us feel much much better? at least we know how much we are worth in terms of "mahr" and shit.. did you know that the Badoo are worth more than the Hadar?

Badoo: Indegenious people ( just like me) who come from the mountains, valleys and rivers, rich in culture, hertiage and PRIDE. Even Al-Saud are bedouins, no wonder all the badoo think they are better then every other race or tribe.

Hadar: Literal translation is " Presence". These are the people who just found themselves present in saudi mostly in the western region because of the pilgrimage trips every year to Makkah and Madina. These faithful neigbors of Allah are now richer than the Badoo because they know they need to work hard to get what they want and the country's businesses are all owned by them.

The Service industry is beneath the Badoo. All service jobs nursing, cleaning, fuel staion attended, tea boys, handmaids, flight attendants, barmaid ( if there were bars that is), waiters all these service oriented positions are a disgrace to the Badoo.

To only serve King and country is honroable. Which explains all the badoos in the army and police and all that. Hadar ( those who are not saudis in : birth, raising and origin) were once not allowed to work in Governemnt sectors. which explains again, why the hadar especially the "Hadramis"( from hadramot) in Yaman and who bin ladin is one of are the rich ones.

Hey... come to think of it "Hadar" might have stemmed from Hadramot and not "Hadara" which is attendance or presence like I was thinking.

whatever..

Makkah and Palistine

Today the streets were blocked. The king was on his way to Makkah. This time not for his own personal peace, but the peace of all Muslims, Christians, and Jews.
The road to peace is now a reality. In the Hands of the now most beloved Saudi King. Or should I say, the King of all Arabs. Finally ridding the world of the only reason why peace was not attainable in Israel even after the so called independent Palistinian Government elections. Local disputes between Fath and Hamas. Hamas , advocating an Islamic way to government proved to the world their real political agendas. Teaching the Muslim world yet again the same lesson but with deeper impact. Religion indeed, should not be used as a tool to attain political autonomy.
Saudi Arabia is going through radical changes. The dark ages in the Arabian Peninsula have come to an end. Islam is being freed of all the negative and morbid ways it was used to control the minds and the hearts of Muslims. Thanks to the Satelite TV revolution. The people can now see for themselves the real implications of their convictions. They realize they have a choice. More than anything else. They realize they’ve been victims of propaganda, and with the Arab sense of pride, that my friends is a start.

From That Woman: Through my eyes.

Saudis are just every where you go..
it's like half of Saudis are spread over some part of the world, but that won't be mathematically correct..
Europe is an amazing place to civilly live, learn and interact with people. You explore many things around you; the kind of life that you've always wanted, a perfect Symphony played by Beethoven per say..

i on the other hand, love to explore, although my senses are always distracted by me caught in a virtuous day dreaming episode..

As i am going up the stairs in Star Bucks that's located in one of Europe's most famous streets, i couldn't help but notice three beautiful - Arab like - girls sitting with a fourth older lady. & that lady was actually their Nanny who is not supposed to leave their shadow, she protects them from the evil, & from human vampires..

i object, i persist, i argue... why the nanny with these young women? why the suffocation and the mis trust? and why obeying these rigid, man-made rules?

no i don't call for a revolution, or rebellion, i am simply asking for a logical explanation that would satisfy my curiosity.. It's either we are obedient and we like to be dominated, or can i say vice versa?

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Fridays with Daddy

With the new Monarch came the promise of a better social existence and a less religion-dependant regime. As I look around me I see the changes, I live the changes. I am here hanging out with my friends at coffee shops, not covering my hair, walking in groups in the mall and the religious police can go screw chickens for all I care. I actually cant wait to be flagged down by any ugly looking bearded ignorant. I need to insult someone.

Yesterday morning my father and I took a long drive to the beach, we sat and grilled stake on his favorite contraption. A grill that thrives on newspaper. No coal, no gass, no mess. He adores it. As we were sitting there enjoying the sound of the waves and eating breakfast, a coast guard vehicle passed by. In the old days, a little questioning ( more like harassment) would have happened. That day the Jeep just slowed down passing by us. 30 minutes later it came back. Looks like the driver can’t help himself and went back for backup. Apparently with a calculated excuse to question us. We weren’t surprised. The excuse: Our car was parked the wrong way. The wrong way in the middle of nowhere! Anyway, My father and I had nothing to hide. All we needed to prove was paternity. They asked my dad to show his identification and mine I don’t understand the shock they displayed at the fact that I’m my dad’s daughter! My dad wittingly looking at his name plate and acting all hospitable inviting him them to join us. The coast guards sheepishly apologized and mumbled something about the place we were in being an official watch guard post ( yeah right). But mind you, it’s perfectly fine that we were there.” Just move the car a little bit sir” and they were gone. Tail between their legs.
Obviously, Fathers and daughters don’t hang out like that in Saudi Arabia.