كيف احزن و الله ربي

كيف احزن و ان اصابني هم جعلت لي في التقوى منه مخرجا
( و من يتق الله يجعل له مخرجا و يرزقه من حيث لا يحتسب)

كيف احزن وانا ان مرضت عندك شفائي و صحتي و قوتي
( اللهم انت الشافي لا شفاء الا شفاؤك شفاء لا يغادر سقما)

كيف احزن ....
و ان ضاقت بي الدنيا بما رحبت فاليك ملجئي و راحتي
جعلت لي في عتمة الاسحار دعوة لا ترد
فسهام الليل لا تخطئ

كيف احزن و انت ارحم بي من امي
و أرأف بحالي من نفسي
حليم.. رحيم ..عفو.. كريم
كيف احزن و ان ضاق رزقي و شح
جعلت لي في صلاة الفجر وفرته.. و في اللاستغفار بركته

كيف احزن و لي رب
ان شكرته على نعمه زادني
و ان ظلمت نفسي اشتاق لسماع صوتي و انتظر عودتي
( و ان شكرتم لأزيدنكم)

كيف احزن و قد حرمت الظلم على نفسك
فلا حبيب الا تقيك
و لا بعيد عنك الا ناديته
و لا وحيد الا انت مؤنسه
كيف احزن و انت ربي
الواحد.. الاحد ..الصمد

عندما نحزن او نتعب او نكره او تضيق بنا الدنيا
نلف.. و ندور
نفكر...و نفكر
لمن نذهب.. لمن نشكو.. من يعيننا.. من يفرج عنا
و ننسى من بيده كل شيئ
الشفاء.. و الرزق.. و السعادة ..و الراحة.. و كل شيء
فكروا قليلا
كل شيء
نبحث عن اي شئ عند اي احد
و لا نبحث عند من يملك كل شيء
تفريج الهموم.. بركة الارزاق.. فك الكربات
بيده الامر كله.. و هو على كل شيء قدير

فهل لمبتغي الراحة ان يجدها في غير موضعها
و هل للانسان ان يبتغي الفرج من غير مصدره
لا و الله
فمن يبحث عن السعادة عند الناس فلن يجدها
و من يبحث عن الراحة في المال فلن يجدها
و من يبحث عن الملك في الظلم فهو بالتاكيد لن يجده

و لن يعطي الله انسان شيئا يبتغيه متجاوزه عند غيره
يا رب كيف ابحث عن حاجتي و هي عندك
و كيف احزن....... و انت ربي



دعاء من أصابته مصيبة

ما من مسلم تصيبه مصيبة فيقول كما أمره الله أنا لله وأنا إليه راجعون ، اللهم أجرني في مصيبتي واخلف لي خيراً منها إلا أخلف الله له خيراً منها


دعاء الهم والحزن

ماأصاب عبداُ هم ولاحزن فقال : اللهم إني عبدك ابن عبدك ابن أمتك ناصيتي بيدك ماضِ في حكمك ، عدل في قضاؤك أسالك بكل اسم هو لك سميت به نفسك أو أنزلته في كتابك ، أو علمته أحداً من خلقك أو استأثرت به في علم الغيب عندك أن تجعل القرآن ربيع قلبي ، ونور صدري وجلاء حزني وذهاب همي " . إلا أذهب الله حزنه وهمه وأبدله مكانه فرحاً


اللهم إني أعوذ بك من الهم والخزن ، والعجز والكسل والبخل والجبن ، وضلع الدين وغلبة الرجال

My life is worth living

Three passions have governed my life: The longings for love, the search for knowledge, And unbearable pity for the suffering of [humankind].

Love brings ecstasy and relieves loneliness. In the union of love I have seen In a mystic miniature the prefiguring vision Of the heavens that saints and poets have imagined.
With equal passion I have sought knowledge. I have wished to understand the hearts of [people]. I have wished to know why the stars shine.

Love and knowledge led upwards to the heavens, But always pity brought me back to earth; Cries of pain reverberated in my heart Of children in famine, of victims tortured And of old people left helpless. I long to alleviate the evil, but I cannot, And I too suffer.

This has been my life; I found it worth living.


adapted

Saudi Marriages and gender roles

I have a friend who just got married to a Saudi. This friend of mine is kinda like me. She had been travelling all her life, she is a half breed, she lived the west and east. She had her share of relationships, none however which were Saudi and she met a man who she thought was well.. just like her.

Today she tells me about her everyday life, how she doesn't understand the psychology behind the partnership she entered. I am writing about this because I myself am amazed at her story.

I remember the days she used to date this guy ( before marrriage). To everyone who is thinking " well, since she dated him, a saudi guy will definitly not respect her and always doubt her and her lifestyle" It is NOT about doubt or jealousy. Not from what I am hearing at least.

Her story is about the marriage, partnership norm.

I never thought that it was complicated. I might disagree or even agree with how some of our cultural backgrounds as saudis dictate to us in behaving like wives. I have no problem with gender roles infact, I agree with most; for a successful marriage there should be the man of the house and the wife that follows, again it is not about that.

I don't even know how to explain it. I think it is about the basic concept of marriage and how couples in it should treat eachother. That is it. Marriage treatment!

In my life I heard oodles and oodles of stories about how couples changed how they relate to eachother or treat eachoter after marriage but never have I heard something like this before.
Suddenly, my friend is being told she is selfish, when she is the most selfless martyr woman I know. Suddenly, she doesn't put her man's need ahead of hers and suddenly she is wrong in everythought and every thing that she does!

Senarios: ( Situation: First time married woman, educated, western, somewhat pampered ( maids and all) sharing a house with a man who is fairly dominant ... aren't they all ? sighh).

- She is timid ofcourse, trying to fit in her new home ( in a new country). She still doesn't know where to get things from or how to share a home with a man. The man expects her to be a ready made homekeeper, he gets annoyed if she doesnt jump at things like buying stuff for the house, cooking at certain times, cleaning, arranging his personal effects ( hello.. did these men ever hear of privacy and I don't know what you want me to touch or not?) or simply her failure to remind him to bring batteries , or olive oil when all the while she was thinking " there must be a grocery day and I'm sure he doesn't want me to go do it alone".

What other instances? yes, things like always calling her to bring him something 2 inches near his reach, or on a rainy day let her go down from the car to get something from the convenience store, maybe her failure to " predict" his sweet tooth needs or what cup to put what in and over over she tells me she understands she is not used to him but the MANNER , the way they guy ORDERS her around in an authoritative voice often leaves her feeling just like one of his staff and not someone emotionally connected to him.

Often she tries to please him by " predicting" his needs, she cleans, she cooks, she even serves him something sweet but instead of appreciation she gets 2 things: 1. silence or as if it is her job and she was supposed to do it anyway ( complete disregard to the fact she worked hard on it or never went on her knees to wipe the floor before or had to invent something to eat from an almost empty cupboard). Apparantly the man explained to her that he expected her to go and buy temporary food and snacks but when she does he complains that he doesnt eat ready made stuff from a gas station store! ok 2: Dissapproval. YES. complete dissaproval of what she tried to do for him, " didn't I tell you not to put sugar, didn't I tell you not to serve me in this glass, how many times do I have to tell you to not give me something I did not ask for!" OK. SORRY.

She called me one night crying. she went back to the kitchen 4 times. 1. she brought him tea. 2- he said is was too sweet bring it back make another 3. she comes back with another he says I don't like the cup 4. make another one because it is now cold transferring from cup to cup!

I would kill myself if that happened to me! and why? because I was thoughtful enough to make the guy some tea this is what I get for trying to please him lol- some people!

Another senario:
- always telling her that this and this is wrong and criticizing her housewife activities.
- accusing her of selfishness because she gets upset when he asks her to stay standing holding something for him when he can put it anywhere beside him while he is doing something.
-accusing her of being selfish and not loving him enough when she gets upset that he makes her go down after making love to buy him cigarettes. ( hello after doing that deed I want to sleep in my mans arms not jump out of bed and act like i am a whore who just did it and now I can continue life as usual! )
- he compares her to his former gf's that they loved him and were selfless with him more ( that they loved him more!) that she doesnt compromise and that maybe that is why he expects too much.
- when told that naturally saudi women were born in a house where they were trained since 7 to cook a kabsa and serve their men he says his x was a working woman too. ( yeah right coming home at 2 everyday is a working woman!) This is another world baby and women dont just have kitchen and men serving in their heads!

- Somehow husbands think that just because they spend on you and take care of you financially you have to be their slave and if you don't be their slave then you don't love them enough. WELL... I know my friend, she is very emotional and she will climb the mountains and cross the seas for the man she loves. But climbing mountains is far more different than climbing stairs and crossing streets in the middle of the night because the guy just Did her! I would rather not have sex than feel like I am not cared for in that way.
-why are men so insensitive? why don't they put themselves in the shoes of the other person when they say hurtful things? When they critizes their women for "untouchable" things such as faith, their mothers, their feelings, their loved ones?

Which brings me to ONE BIG REALIZATION!! MEN.. are affected by the other men who share their same culture and background. No matter how cultured, well travelled and civilized a Saudi is, if his family, his friends, his workmates, his society does not do these things with their women and just feel they are the king because they spend on them and women should serve them. Well.. How can you expect him to be different when he is right?

Heaven and Hell in Islam

One thing that I can't take and I have to work on is when someone attacks my Iman ( faith). All my life I have been the epitomy of faith, the one who believes in God and his reasons, the one who will stand up for what I believed in and the one who loves God so much that I even excuse him for how he allowed his religion to be interpreted. There is nothing I hate more than how Islam is being pictured to muslims and none muslims by the very people we entrusted our "3ilm and thikr too" I admit that I have a problem with men of religion ( do not dare call them men of faith). Just the way they look, how they have no mercy or humanity in their hearts and how they JUDGE JUDGE JUDGE. Anyway, that is not what I am writing about today. Today is about how one person doubted my faith because of the LITERAL description of Heaven that I criticized by saying that if it were as what our religion tells us it is... rivers of wine and honey, trees, castles, women kinds and colors, fruits, gold and silver etc. Then to be honest I don't want it.
Yes, I don't want heaven if it is only that. First of all I am not a man to be jumping with joy for maidens young and virgins, second of all I have all the wine and honey I want whenever I want it, third of all, I am not in the desert to value green trees and last and definitly not least... I am not materialistic to be hoarding all my "hasant" and good deeds to build castles and castles of silver and gold in heaven. In short. I do not believe that My Allah, my beloved merciful all knowing God who created my soul prepared for me a heaven that I don't want to be in.
There is a hadeeth or even in the Quran it said that in Heaven is what no eye has seen, no ear has heard of and no thought that has ever crossed any human's heart. Sooooo... What gives?! Why am I being judged now for saying that I don't like the things that my eye has seen ( literal description of trees and rivers), My ear has heard ( all these descriptions and 7oor 3een and all that) and the thoughts and imaginations that come with them?!

I have always said.. Mo2mineen or faithful ones are not Muslimeen. I'm not the only one who says it, the quran says it and I will try to find the ayah about it. But that is another story, about how God said don't say that you are faithful say you are muslims because islam is not like Iman if you only knew.

The person I had an argument with said that I say stuff that might plunge my soul into hell for 70 falls and that is even more in God's time! why? because I am using my brains? because my God told me that Islam is reason!! because my God said that he likes it when people " yejtahido" to find the truth.. because I am not just listening to what was indocrinated in other people to the point of blind belief in things that are not reasonable? So much has opened in my spiritual life now that I am part of the saudi society again. From the faithful girl who people used to praise for not having lost values, for my deep faith and most of all my obsession with the Quran and how much I integrate it in my life, to the... " the one who's faith is uestionable"! Question my Islam because I am sure that more than 50% have a wrong understanding of real Islam but please don't touch my faith yo!

I was once accused of being Quranic. SO WHAT?
I maintain that some hadeeths have been plagiarized, that the hearsay from one man to another to the generation we are in must have and has been ( proven) to be incorrent and sometimes outrageous! we have accounts of hadeeths that are weak, that are strong that are even unfounded! So who can blame me for being Quranic?
So the Quran described Heaven with the rivers and trees.. well.. Mohammad was an Arab, the Quran was in Arabic so that the Arabs will understand it. What is the difference then if I were to say that the Quran said heaven was water and trees because that is what the Arabs valued most? Even in the Accounts of youm algiyamah.. " wa itha Al3isharo 3ottilat" ( I am not sure of the Ayah) but I am sure that 3ishar means camels. So why the special mention? because that is what is closer to the Arab mind. So why the rivers and women and trees? because that is what is closer to the Arab mind. When I explain to children why they should be good and I tell them that good kids go to heaven and bad kids go to hell, I say in heaven there are rainbows and toys and nice things and colors and cookies and in hell there are monsters and pirates and scary things and bad vegtables.. What kind of incentive would it be to say hey there are trees and wine rivers and women?! So.. If this is how I explain it to the young and unable to fathom minds, why can't we see that God explained heaven as he did because us humans have limited minds and just like toys and heaven to children he said camels and women to Arabs. LOGIC. ISLAM IS LOGIC. ok. Period.

Realizing this. Does this mean I just compromised my faith? No. On the contrary. I have just strengthened it. Because accepting just what is written and not having faith and trust in God that he knows the human soul enough to reward the Good people with what their hearts longed for, whether Arab or not, materialistic or not, womanizer or not well.. let us just say I trust my creator more than these people claim to understand what he is telling us in the Quran , when over and over again God keeps saying in the Quran that he brought it in Arabic so we would understand it. And believe me, when I let go of all the "tafaseer" except ofcourse fo the meaning of some hard words, and read it for my self I understood it and became more faithful and Muslim than I have ever been.

I have one rule in life. God made us and gave us Fitrah. What your heart says is right is right. As soon as debate, fear, compulsion even by things like the religious police or teachers come in then this is not fitrah anymore this is barmajah or programming.

And wow.. How saudis are programmed!

In search of your dreams

Those who dare having a project in life, foregoing everything to live their Personal Legend, will end up achieving anything. The important thing is to keep the fire in your heart and be strong to overcome hard moments.
Remember, the desires that are in our souls do not come from the nothingness; someone put them there. And this someone, who is pure love and only wishes our happiness, only did it because he gave us, together with these desires, the tools to make them happen.

The risky climb
In the middle of a storm, a pilgrim reaches an inn and the owner asks where he is going.
“I’m going to the mountains,” he answers.
“Forget it,” says the innkeeper, “it’s a risky climb, and the weather is awful.”
“But I’m going up,” answers the pilgrim, “if my heart gets there first, it will be easy to follow it with my body.”

What’s the price?
“Is the price of living a dream much higher than the price of living without daring to dream?” asked the disciple.
The master took him to a clothes store. There, he asked him to try on a suit in exactly his size. The disciple obeyed, and was very amazed at the quality of the clothes.
Then the master asked him to try on the same suit – but this time a size much bigger than his own. The disciple did as he was asked.
“This one is no use. It’s too big.”
“How much are these suits?” the master asked the shop attendant.
“They both cost the same price. It’s just the size that is different.”
When leaving the store, the master told his disciple, “Living your dream or giving it up also costs the same price, which is usually very high. But the first lets us share the miracle of life, and the second is of no use to us.”

The Search of the Path
“I am willing to leave everything. Please, take me as a disciple.”
“How does a man choose his Path?”
“Through sacrifice. A path that demands sacrifice is a true path.”
The abbot bumped into a bookcase. A very rare vase fell down and the young man threw himself to the floor to pick it up. He fell the wrong way and broke his arm. But he was able to save the vase.
“Which sacrifice is greater, to see the vase breaking down our breaking an arm to save it?”
“I don’t know.”
“So then, do not try to guide your choice through sacrifice. The path is chosen by our capacity of compromising with each step we make while we walk.”

The Drunkard Disciple
A Zen master had hundreds of disciples. They all prayed at the right time, except one, who was always drunk.
The master was growing old. Some of the more virtuous pupils began to wonder who would be the new leader of the group, the one who would receive the important secrets of the Tradition.
On the eve of his death, however, the master called the drunkard disciple and revealed the hidden secrets to him.
A veritable revolt broke out among the others.
“How shameful!” they cried in the streets, “We have sacrificed ourselves for the wrong master, one who can’t see our qualities.”
Hearing the commotion outside, the dying master remarked, “I had to pass on these secrets to a man that I knew well. All my pupils are very virtuous, and showed only their qualities. That is dangerous, for virtue often serves to hide vanity, pride and intolerance. That is why I chose the only disciple whom I know really well, since I can see his defect: drunkenness.”

On love and being loved

I was once told not so long ago..

Every great Romance is bound to end in tragedy. Backed by Qays and Layla, Romeo and Juliet , hell.. Even Shahrazad was gonna lose her head lest she entertained Shahrayar with exciting tales for a thousand and one nights.

If love stories didn’t end in tragedy what would be so beautiful about them? The whole point is to end something amidst its magic , at its peak to preserve its memory and not wait until its beauty becomes a flower that time devours.

I used to believe it. It made sense. And so I shied away from whirl wind romances. I don’t like to lose things. So I just made sure I didn’t own anyone I wouldn’t have wanted to lose in the first place.

The other world suffers from my hang-ups. In arabic we literally call a hang up a knot "ogdha".But he’s unknotting my knots one by one. Putting out every spark of doubt or flame of insecurity.

God how I love him. I hope he sees how much he molds me without knowing, every time we speak and say goodnight I find a better person in me than who I was only hours ago.


It’s miraculous though. Scary but wonderful. I think it’s a directly proportional property that of love. The greater you love, the greater the risk of pain, hurt and shit. Just like the less you love, the less you hurt incase anything happens.

My whole love life was based on the theory of “loving less for hurting less”. Time and time again I’d tell my girlfriends to not love and just be loved. Capitalizing on the "personality" factor more than the physical. If you want loyalty, find an ugly man. ( yes I had issues, blame it on Wahabbisville) That when the guy loves you more and you don’t really give that much of a shit about him.. You have made it to blissful partnership.

No fights, no heartaches, no cheesy shit and most of all the joy of.. eternal “habolation” habol means –running after you- from the guy because he knew in his heart that he reallydid not have you yet.

Ofcourse, SEX is always a factor but you don't really look for what you don't miss. And this in fact is one of Islamic rules of marriage.. No pre- marital sex so you would be satisified with your spouse package whatever it is and not look for the supposedly more pleasurable feeling of another experience that you had once before with someone else.. It actually works if you ask me.

So that's my answer to those who think I am ab- normal when it comes to sexual desires.
or the lack of it ( hey not all of us get horny after half a liter of rum)

Sighhh the theory of "love less to hurt less" also explains my oh – so- envied- “success” so far. That’s the secret of the trade. It’s not because I’m a hot chica babe who masters the science of male taming lol . Hell no.. My heart palpitates at a raised voice, I’d cry at grin and walk out when I’m not comfortable. I can’t even live with male pheromones around me for 24 hours straight. l always need my own room. I’ve lived my whole life in relationships but out of them at the same time. And because of that I guess I never learned anything.

I’ve never loved before. The way love is supposed to be. Not until now. Now I am in love. And I love with all my senses. My sight, my smell, my taste, my touch and hearing. I see nothing, smeel nothing, taste nothing and hear nothing but him. his face, his voice, his taste, his touch. Yuckkkkkkkkkkkkkk I knowwwwww but it’s ttrueeeeeee uhuhuhuh No one can hide from the truth and I find it so envigoratingly cute have this in my life. I’m so lucky. I love him with all my heart, mind and aching longing yearning soul. It doesn’t matter what he feels about me anymore lol .. all that matters is how I adore him. This is the classic- wherever you are, whoever you are with\ I love you till the end of time and I just want you to be happy- scenario.

So either way I’m not afraid of being hurt coz nothing can hurt me ( yeah right tell it to the marines huh? ). My heart is exposed for the taking like cheese cloth to maggots in a Luis Pasteur spontaneous generation experiment.

I thank God for for the other world every time I pray. I know he’s heavenly because he is the answer to my prayers. The kind of answer you don’t expect but then realize that it is. He came when I was praying night and day, crying to just know the way, asking God literally this…

“ Oh savior, oh savior, ( ya mogheeth, -the one who saves-) Oh you with the marvelous thrown, Doer of what you will, I ask you by the light of your face that lights up all the heavens and your mercy that encompasses everything, Oh savior , save me. Lead me to your light and lead your light to me” .


There he was. . my Heart, Honor, Happiness and Hope. My H.

and there I was exposing my soul like crazy and he was actually listening. And there was God.. smiling upon us.

The opposite of love is not hate...it is indifference.

in⋅dif⋅fer⋅ence
  /ɪnˈdɪfərəns, -ˈdɪfrəns/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [in-dif-er-uhns, -dif-ruhns] Show IPA
–noun
1. lack of interest or concern: We were shocked by their indifference toward poverty.
2. unimportance; little or no concern: Whether or not to attend the party is a matter of indifference to him.
3. the quality or condition of being indifferent.
4. mediocre quality; mediocrity.
Origin:
1400–50; late ME, var. of indifferency < L indifferentia. See indifferent, -ence, -ency

Synonyms:
1. Indifference, unconcern, listlessness, apathy, insensibility all imply lack of feeling. Indifference denotes an absence of feeling or interest; unconcern, an absence of concern or solicitude, a calm or cool indifference in the face of what might be expected to cause uneasiness or apprehension; listlessness, an absence of inclination or interest, a languid indifference to what is going on about one; apathy, a profound intellectual and emotional indifference suggestive of faculties either naturally sluggish or dulled by emotional disturbance, mental illness, or prolonged sickness; insensibility, an absence of capacity for feeling or of susceptibility to emotional influences.

Antonyms:
1. eagerness, responsiveness.

Is he worth it?

Relationships are hard. They are hard to start, harder to maintain and hard to end. Relationships are also complicated. No matter what we say, any relationship worth having is both hard and complicated. The question that I often ask myself when I look at a man is: Is he worth it? You see, in my opinion when I start a relationship, I take on a series of responsibilities and challenges. Starting a relationship means not running away at the first sign of trouble, it means sticking by her during the good times and the bad times, it means accepting the unacceptable, it means compromising on what you thought was un-compromisable, it means swallowing your pride to preserve his, it means loosing yourself so that he can find himself. These are not easy things to do. But once you start the relationship, this is what you must be prepared to go through.

So, back to my question: “Is he worth it?”. “Would I be willing to go through the gates of hell for him?”. If the answer is no, then better walk away. I always feel that relationships are out of 10. If one party gives 8, the other will give 2, if one party gives 4 the other will give 6. When I explain this concept to most people, they immediately assume that the successful relationships are those where both give 5. This is, in my opinion, not correct. Successful relationships are those where the numbers change constantly and no one keeps track.

Unfortunately it is very difficult not to keep track. It’s human nature. It is human nature to bicker and count mistakes and to re-open dead issues over and over and over again. That’s just the way we are. It takes a supreme effort that goes against everything we stand for as human beings to not do that. So, my second question for a relationship is “Is he worth it?”. Is he worth that effort? When the day comes that I have to choose between him and his self indulgence , who/what will my choice be?

Relationships are hard. They end. They end badly. They end in disaster. And they hurt. However, there are also good things in relationships: The companionship, the closeness, the sharing, the intimacy, the comfort and so much more. How do you balance those two? For me, I simply try to weight one against the other and just ask myself “Is he worth it? Is he worth the risk?

The beauty about such a question is that it really allows me to test everything against it. For me, it just comes down to that simple equation. Is everything that will happen next worth the risk of what might happen afterwards?

I know it might sound selfish at first glance. But when you really look at it, it is not really. It is a question that insures that I will try my very best, each and every time. No compromises on that. If he’s worth it, then he deserves my best, nothing less

-HP

something no one can take away from you

And when you lose it. You lose your soul. In Arabic we call it “Karama” maybe in English it is called dignity.

Karamah is when you stand up for what you believe in. When you value your self, your words and your promises to the people you love. And to God. It is to rid yourself from material and physical pleasures and put your principles and your word first at all times.

I used to think this “karamah” thing was overrated. Mocked people even sometimes accused them of lacking it because they made it such a big deal. I realize now that i didn’t know what I was taking about. Neither did they. Because if they did really.. you wouldn’t hear a peep about anything that had to do with” karamah”.

It’s a silent powerful bond between first of all, you and yourself then between you and God. Once you lose your “karamah” you lose everything. Including God’s support and that’s what I believe. My karamah is what kept me lucky, gave me hope and Blessed me with the love of an angel. I hope I didn’t betray my karama because it feels like the universe turned on me. From conspiring me to conspiring against me. I’m not about to make it worse.

When you turn down a basket of Goodies the trips the perfumes the gifts and the empty promises ( my jerk radar is made in NASA) lol Shit, when you have a license to shop till you drop and when you are offered the world. Familier? All my ladies in the house who have guys trying to buy their love raise your hands in the air wave em like u just don’t care

When you are repeatedly insulted , your character, your commitment, your fucking intelligence and you just leave it. When you suffer so much shit and still try not to hate or breakdown and surrender to it. When you choose the hard way when the easy way is just a nod away….. When you can plot and deceive and prosper and achieve.

When you have the choice to get everything without hurting those u don’t want to get hurt wouldn’t know anyway.

Once upon a time they wouldn’t. But now he knws everything. believe me, he’d know just from the tone of my voice if I was hiding something The force is strong with him and that’s why I love him.

One of my friends said that men don’t have to know everything. You don’t have to tell everything to the man you love especially if you want to keep him around. You just have to do what u gotta do and just forgive yourself. It was never about the deed, it was always about getting caught doing it. But for me she said that it’s so dangerous the guilt that doesn’t make u sleep at night urging you to tell him. Then you do. Then … you realize it was better not to because life is just miserable and so many opportunities were lost. Not only you are still sleepless but he would be now too.

I say BS. The love we share me and him is not from here. It is from up above I’d rather die than taint it. In his words before we met.. “ heavenly”

Wtf was I saying?

Yes karamah. Wow . how strong and proud that can make you feel. Everytime I think of the man I love and honoring him I love myself more. Ironic.. Wealth found in the spirit’s intentions.

Truth, honestly, loyalty, purity. I love myself for loving him that much.

Others would say… why not? Go ahead.. just do it , give him what he wants and who cares you don’t have to be serious about it and convenience is always welcome. H won’t know about it so why the drama?

The drama? The drama is not a drama.

I can never live with myself if I did anything as much as a heartfelt hug! I will not be able to look at myself, to respect myself, to even keep my faith in God. I’ve hurt enough and what’s left will never ever even think about it again.

I love Mr.H that I can never describe just how much. But maybe if I said that I love him enough to forever burn in hell for him. All I want is to live what’s left of this mortal life feeling him inside me Not even my breath travels inside me like he does .

أمراض الرجل السعودي

1

تجده يهاب العادات والتقاليد ويلتزم بها أكثر من الدين والشرع !!

وأغلب تصرفاته يحكمها خوفه من المجتمع

2

لا يفكر بطريقته الخاصة

يطبق العادات والتقاليد حتى لو كان غير مقتنع بها

وواثق انها خطأ

3

يصغر أخطائه وبكبر أخطاء المرأة

مع أن الإسلام والشرع ساوى في الحرام والحلال والعقوبات

4

أناني يمارس أمور كثيرة

وفي الوقت نفسه يمنع محارمه من ممارستها

والمفروض يكون قدوة إن كانت خطأ

فلماذا يمارسها هو !

( الإنترنت من الأمثلة )

5

يريد أن يعرف أدق التفاصيل عن زوجته وليس من حقها ان يكون لها أي خصوصية

أما هو

فإنسان غامض ليس من حقها التدخل في شؤونه .

6

يتجاهل تطبيق السنة

ولا يتذكر سنة الرسول صلى الله عليه وسلم ووجوب الإقتداء بها

الا

في نقطة ( التعدد )

7

يرحم الخادمة ويتعاطف معها أكثر من رحمته وحنيته لزوجته !!

لدرجة أن بعض الزوجات تضطر للكذب على زوجها عندما ترغب في الذهاب للسوق وتتعذر بأن النواقص للخادمة

لأنها تعلم أنه سيوافق !

8

مبدع في العلاقات الغير شرعية في أسلوب الكلام في الحنان في الهدايا

اما في الزواج

رجل فاشل جاف قاسي متسلط

9

لا يخجل من الاعتراف بعلاقاته الغير شرعية

ولو اتصلت عليه فتاة في مجلس كلمها بكل ثقة وتفاخر

أما زوجته

فاتصالها يعتبر جريمة ويسبب له ارتباك و إحراج

تجده يحاول ينهي المكالمة في أسرع وقت ممكن

10

لا يعرف قيمة زوجته ولا يصرح بحبه لها

إلا

بعد وفاتها

! !

11

يقبل أمور كثيرة لبنات المسلمين ويمارسها لكنه لا يقبلها على أخواته وبناته

وأمثلة على ممارسته هذا الأسلوب ،،، بالحلال زواج المسيار ،،، وبالحرام الغزل

12

في كل دولة تجد محارمه بزي مختلف

وكأن الأحكام الشرعية تختلف من دولة الى دولة !

في السعودية والخليج شكل ،،، والدول العربية شكل ،،، والدول الغير عربية شكل !!

13

يرفض قيادة المرأة ويقبل وجود السائق الأجنبي مع محارمه !

ويقبل ان يكون الرجل الأجنبي

المرافق الدائم لعائلته !!

14

لديه عقدة أسمها / عقدة المرأة

فهو لا يتقبل رأيها ولا يأخذ بكلامها حتى لو أقنعته ولا يمكن أن يستشيرها إذا واجهته مشكلة

لانها ( امرأة ) فهو لا يثق في رأي المرأة

مع ان المصطفى صلى الله عليه وسلم عندما نزل عليه الوحي أول مرة

ومع أن هذا الأمر من أعظم الأمور التي واجهته ومع ذلك لم يلجأ الى أي رجل

أكتفى برأي زوجته ( السيدة خديجة رضي الله عنه )

عندما أشارت اليه بأن يذهبون الى ورقة بن نوفل .

16

من ناحية المعلومات الدينية

الرجل السعودي أول آية يحفظها

قال تعالى ( الرجال قوامون على النساء )

وأكثر حديث يردده

قول الرسول صلى الله عليه وسلم( المرأة ناقصة عقل ودين)

17

متناقض يردد القوامة ويتفاخر بها ثم يبحث عن المسيار !!

18

الرجل السعودي الرجل الوحيد في العالم

الذي تجده يذم بنات بلده في كل مكان ويمتدح بنات الدول الأخرى